A reading to share emotions: The Story of Thomais

NOVEMBER 2017 – Laura Harris from WFTS – The Now Tampa Bay Interviewed Thomais!

Click the picture to watch!

 

Click the link to watch the video:    Fave page from book…

All families – diagnosis or not – are welcomed to join Thomais as she reads favorite pages from her book “The Story of Thomais”.

Thomais recently expressed: “Parents you must also share your emotions with your kids!

In a safe and child friendly environment children and parents will share, using words or drawing, their emotions.

EMOTIONS  – Thomais latest video!

NOTE:  We’ll be collecting items – canned food and/or grocery store gift cards to be given away during The Harbor Dish Thanksgiving celebration —     Details here: https://www.facebook.com/harbordish/

 

Read about her book – The Story of Thomais

Thomais has autism. She is understanding and acknowledging her EMOTIONS. She is also learning it is important to express them and there are many ways to do this…

Thomais was learning 3 languages, reaching milestones like any other child – until December 2010 when she had a massive regression. She stopped talking, lining up toys, behavior crisis began and she was sick every month.

April 2012, what we lived  –   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfcRxgTZVHk

Almost 7 years later, after many interventions, therapies, over doses of love, patience and attention, Thomais is capable of engaging the day to day. She faces many challenges and as time passes they are easier to manage…

 

REFERENCES-

Deborah McNamara, Ph.D.  – Five Things You Might Not Know About Human Emotion

 

Background info – videos showing past experiences/reality and progress!

Sept 2017 – Surviving Hurricane Irma
https://www.facebook.com/yadira.c1/videos/10103269090054464/?permPage=1

Oct 2017 – Song to Fall Asleep – After Hurricane Maria, a family member who lost her home could not sleep… Thomais has sung various versions of this for her… She’s laughed and put her mind in a different place briefly… May it bring peace and laughter to your home as well… #Autism does not stop her from feeling for others!!

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A diagnosis does not give anyone the right to insult others…

I will highlight and cheer for those who treat us with respect. Always! It is so important to give feedback and communicate with those who respect your needs, strengths and weaknesses.

I will also highlight those who do not respect the fact we are members of this immense planet and for one reason or another, seek special treatment.

What happened? Another learning experience at the park…

Kids all over, screaming, having fun, little groups here and there. My kid is by herself. Sometimes I can tell she’s fine with this reality. Other times she’s not and she goes out there and asks, do you want to play with me. My heart melts every time I hear her… 3-6yrs ago, she could not do this! Now she can. Now she has power. Now she has the tools to engage, socialize and learn from others, while they also learn with her.

She approaches this  group of kids… They all know each other. A couple of them were receptive to her request. Others ignored her – she does not like this! One flat out rejected her and began to make weird noises towards her. Of course, this bothers her and I remind Thomais — just ignore him. But she can’t!!

No one likes to feel rejected. In her case, as with many, instead of focusing on those who showed receptiveness to her request. She focused on the rejection. I let her be at this point. She has to learn to figure this out and I will not always be around.

She started to make noises at him as well and called him a bully. I laughed because I welcomed this original approach (that she can do now!) and she was being a kid.

It all turned messy when the boy decided to call her an idiot. Oh no I thought. And her reaction was pure emotion, sadness and she ran away from the group. She screamed: “No one had ever called me an idiot. Why did he do this mom?”

I reminded her: “You are not that. You are an incredible young girl. You are loving. You are fun. Go talk to his mom.”

Before she reaches the mom, his sisters start screaming… “He cannot help himself. He has a heart condition. He always does this!”

I am livid… A young boy with a disability who has not been taught to respect others and is being allowed by the adults in his family to say whatever he thinks. And his relatives are protecting his actions under the premise of lack of control and a heart condition.

I tell the girls. Excuse me, understand something; he has a disability but that does not give him the right to treat others like he just did. That is wrong. The girls kept insisting his heart condition is responsible for this.

I said no, that is not true. My daughter has autism and I teach her to treat others with respect. We do not use her autism as an excuse to cover up the challenges and many times, the lack of  filter in what she may say.

By now, Thomais reached the mom. She told her. The mom did nothing.

Thomais returns to the group and the girls made the effort to talk to her and include her in the brief game. I thanked the girls for their efforts. I reminded Thomais, let’s move on, look the girls want to play with you.

The young boy who insulted her stopped saying the insulting disrespectful word after I asked him to do so.

My heart is still heavy remembering her face, her disappointment and once in a while when OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) tries to take control of the day, she brings up that event.

I will continue to remind her — we all have challenges, we all have super positive traits, we must always be respectful of the differences. It will be very boring if we were all the same. You are a person, you have a heart and a soul  — autism does not rule your existence, please remember that.

My wish… That other parents of children with a diagnosis share similar messages, regardless of the challenges. Our kids’ apparent limitations cannot stop them from being amazing beings and it cannot be an excuse to mistreat others. None of us should accept that.

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Learning about Raffles!

Greatest experience ever…  another one!

To see my daughter being a kid and learning the big lessons in life

Enjoy her creation, words, illustrations and expression of emotions…

Video here: Raffles Really Really Stink by Thomais

Individuals in the spectrum are very literal

Explaining the concept of a raffle takes many efforts, subtleties and the classic be ready for the unexpected survival skill we parents – diagnosis or not – utilize quite efficiently…

At 9yrs old this became a fun experience, drawing it made it easier to handle…
Bottom line: Emotions shared and unwillingly comprehending she did not win and she has to deal with it…
A big plus… no behavior crisis, no torture for no one…
We continue… Enjoy!

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AUTISM REALITIES

We know all about autism awareness.

We want action. Life with autism is 365 days, 24/7…

These are various posts  I shared in social media. They reflect the reality of many families. For many it’s been the same or worse for 10+ years. The media rarely reports on these matters.

Do share!

Continue reading AUTISM REALITIES